Learning to love my body

I’ve been recording yoga videos to share this week. I catch myself being super judgmental of my body. Like many women, I am not comfortable with the way I look, but I’m trying real hard.

My body has a story. A year and a half ago I sat and drank beer every day for 11 weeks with my dad who had throat cancer. He could not swallow food so the only calories I could get him to consume was beer. So we drank. And the pounds started piling on.

The week after he passed I took a job that required travel and eating out three meals a day. I was too tired most of the time to exercise by the time I was back to my hotel and grief sucked away anything that was left.

In March my job was eliminated due to the pandemic. I started making positive changes and dropping weight when the quarantine started. I turned to yoga to deal with my anxiety and began making healthier choices. Then I got Covid. I am fortunate I didn’t get as sick as many, but for two weeks I could barely move. As I do start to move my body again I’m finding that I’ve lost some of my strength. I don’t like what I see in the mirror or on videos I made. 

But here’s the thing: all of our bodies have stories. I am strong and getting stronger. I can hug and play with my son. I can go on adventures with my husband. It serves me every single day. I’m learning to be gentle and trying to love this body that gives so much. So, I will share the imperfect photos and videos because I know I’m not alone. It’s hard, but I will learn to love my body. 

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